Freedomain Radio

How should one deal with situations of emotional abuse. Getting the abuser out of your life seems obvious but what if you have concern for others being abused by him/her. Specifically children.Should you get involved? if so, how?

 Do you think a DRO model can protect children from emotional abuse?

 If theres already a podcast, please point me to it. thanks.

This is always a tough question. I think the first thing you should do is forget about DROs for now, I assume that this is a situation in your life, so speculating how some possible organisation in a theoretical future would handle it isn't really important at the moment.

Correct me if I am wrong, but it seems that this may be a younger sibling situation. I have not had to deal with this issue specifically, but I think it depends on the type of abuse. If it is something that is actionable by the police, I would put a call in to them. If it isn't, the best thing you can do in my opinion is set a good example. Show them that they don't have to put up with it forever, that they can leave when they are older. If they are old enough to communicate independant of their parents, give them your email, phone number etc. Tell them that you are not leaving because of them.

Do not let the abuser (parent?) use them as a tool to manipulate you. If you allow it, they will use the connection to keep you in the abusive situation. 

Thanks ash.

Specifically, its an uncle who has been very abusive (emotionally) in the past to his wife and children. I believe he has gone to therapy and may have "found the light" but the damage is done. His wife, who was once vibrant, energetic and outgoing, is a spirit crushed. Quiet, shamed and introverted. The children (now teens) are poor students and a bit rebellious. I only see them occassionally but when their father speaks to them, I see anger, bitterness and fear in their eyes.

Oh, thats terrible :(

I also have two young cousins who I loved spending time with and playing with since they were born - I was the 'cool older cousin'. After their parents got divorced a few years ago, their mother, who has custody, went crazy evangelical christian, and started really emotionally abusing the kids, telling them they were posessed by the devil etc. I haven't seem them in a few years, I can no longer stand looking into their eyes, all I can see is pain.

I did struggle with this for quite a while, wanting to jump in and help them, but the reality of the situation is that there isn't anything I can do, so I am just going to set an example for them and hope that when they are older they will be curious and want to reestablish contact.

If they are in their teens, give them your email, perhaps stay in touch and you'll have a chance to help guide them through the transition away from their family if they want it when they are older.

I really wish I had a more satisfying answer for you.